Get all 38 J. M. Smig releases available on Bandcamp and save 20%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Twelve-Tone Alchemy in the Hall of Corruptible Saints and Masters, A Russian Vulvectomy, Unnatural Love Bytes, Cayenne Fapper, Underarm Overture, Black Coffee Waltz (revised arrangement for virtual wind quintet and percussion), Hiss In Vinegar (10th Anniversary Remaster), Curcuma Morta, and 30 more.
1. |
Teresa
04:04
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2. |
Fairy Lust
06:56
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3. |
Virgin Von Draws
02:45
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4. |
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Chinese people never swear.
Chinese people never swear.
Ah-so.
Ah-so.
Chinese people never swear.
Ah-so.
Ah-so.
Chinese people never swear.
Ah-so.
Ah-so.
Chinese people never swear.
Ah-so.
Ah-so.
Chinese chicken.
© 2017 J. M. Smig / Sophisticated Schizophrenic.
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5. |
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湯匙橄欖油
個雞蛋輕輕毆打
湯匙玉米粉玉米澱粉
湯匙平原多用途麵粉
半茶匙鹽
茶匙胡椒
茶匙大蒜鹽
茶匙辣椒粉
個雞胸肉片切碎成大小塊
醬
湯匙芝麻油
瓣大蒜 去皮和切碎
湯匙中國米醋白葡萄酒醋也將工作
湯匙蜂蜜
湯匙甜辣椒醬
湯匙番茄醬
湯匙紅糖
湯匙醬油
服務
煮好的飯
湯匙芝麻
大堆蔥 切碎
說明
將炒鍋或大型煎鍋中的油加熱至非常熱
當油正在加熱時 將雞蛋放在個淺碗中 將玉米面放在另個淺碗中 將麵粉 鹽 胡椒 大蒜鹽和辣椒粉加入另個淺碗中 混合在一起
將雞肉放入玉米粉中 然後浸泡在雞蛋中確保所有的雞都被雞蛋洗淨 最後將其清理乾淨的麵粉 加入鍋中煮6-7分鐘 在烹調過程中轉動兩到三次 直至煮熟 您可能需要分兩次烹飪我發現只要不超過只雞胸肉 我可以一次做一次 從鍋中取出 放在碗里 內置廚房毛巾
將所有醬油成分加入到熱鍋中 高溫攪拌均勻 直到醬汁減少約三分之需要分鐘 把雞放回來放在醬裡面塗上 煮分鐘
關掉熱量 分開四碗 與米飯搭配 頂部配芝麻和洋蔥
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6. |
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7. |
Rich Man, Poor Manners
06:50
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8. |
Nobody's Birthday
03:29
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9. |
Snapper Crapper
02:52
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It’s the end of the night.
You’re at the end of the bar.
You’re both drunk and lonely
and you get in her car.
She fed you some wine
and a little cognac
and the next thing she knows,
you’re sniffin’ round her back
and she says,
“What do you think you’re doin’?”
You say, “Come on baby.
Don’t let this night go to ruin.
“You know what I want.
You know that you want the same.
Don’t you be sayin’ that line.
Don’t you be playin’ that game.”
CHORUS:
You gotta go down on her snapper while you’re diggin’ her crapper.
Go down on her snapper while you’re diggin’ her crapper.
Go down on her snapper while you’re diggin’ her crapper.
Go down on her snapper while you’re diggin’ her crapper.
You’re both half-dressed
and you’re both half-cocked
and the window is open.
They can hear you down the block.
You call her Jane
but her name is Jill.
You rub it with your thumb
and ask if she’s on the pill.
You get off the pants
and the panties, too.
You pull them down with your teeth
and she laughs at you.
When she’s not looking,
you sniff the lace
then you grab her by the hips
and pull her to your face.
(CHORUS)
Red wings, brown wings.
You just don’t care
as long as she’s got it
sticking up in the air.
You want to give her a ram,
you’ve got to give her a ream.
You’ve got to build up the cream.
You’ve got to make her scream.
So you’re getting her going
and she’s grinding and bucking.
She’s says she’s getting there
and you’re not even fucking.
You want to get her ready
to feed her the beef
because you think you’re so big
that you’ll make her queef.
(CHORUS)
You’re both going down hard
and it’s feeling real pleasant.
Then with a wink of her eye,
she gives you a present.
(CHORUS)
and around
and around…
© 2017 J. M. Smig / Sophisticated Schizophrenic.
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10. |
Professional Static
02:58
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J. M. Smig Salem, Massachusetts
The musical equivalent of the guy at the party who offends everyone by mooning the camera (but guess what everyone does to
the camera minutes later), Smig is the Witch City's composer laureate (not a difficult achievement, in all honesty).
"[C]ontemporary music for the bizarre at heart...[His] electronica and classical works operate in a style unlike any other."
(Electronic Musician newsletter)
... more
J. M. Smig recommends:
Sophisticated tApes Vol. 1
by Various Artists
A free download featuring tracks from J. M. Smig and other independent artists that might be cooler than you.
go to album
Jennifer's Appendix, Vols. 3 & 4: 'A Sidewalker's Sweet Revenge'
by Matt DeMello
Matt Demello live at The Sidewalk Cafe in Alphabet City, NYC. A collection of live sets that kick ass so hard that you should apply hem cream before listening.
go to album
Volume 1: Deliverance
by Batwanger
21 sonic slices of progressive garage rock. First volume of a lo-fi compilation of jams, covers and originals.
go to albumIf you like J. M. Smig, you may also like:
Cassandra Abandoned, I & II [Marion's Version]
by Matt DeMello
supported by 26 fans who also own “Professional Static”
Where else can you spend 2+ hours listening to such an amazing mix of genres and sounds? Take an eddie, relax and enjoy the ride.
go to album
featured on Bandcamp Radio Oct 27, 2023
go to album
